15 Problems Only Butch Lesbians Understand

1. Gendered restrooms. If I go in the women’s restroom, there’s a chance someone will think I’m a guy, but I can’t go into the men’s restroom because it’s basically just a giant pool of urine.

2. When you look butch so people assume everything about you is butch. Just because I’m wearing a bowtie doesn’t mean I own a circular saw. Also what is a circular saw?

3. Avoiding dressing rooms like the plague. Just so you can avoid that one old lady who thinks you’re a man invading the space of women who are trying to change in peace! You can try explaining it to her but she probably already fainted from the imagined controversy.

4. When a customer service rep calls you sir. But it’s not even worth correcting him. You’re just trying to get an eBay fee reversed. And hey, if he thinks you’re a man named Stephanie and he’s cool with it, that’s awesome.

5. When straight guys feel way too comfortable saying misogynist garbage around you. Guys who will say to you, “Women are crazy, man. You get it, I’m sure!” Is their logic: “You look kind of like a dude so you must love hating women like a dude?” Because that’s false.


6. When someone assumes you’re incredibly strong. This flannel just means I’m cold. Also, I can barely lift this flannel. God help me if it falls.

7. When you ask for a Ryan Gosling haircut and walk out of the salon looking like a small-town 9-year-old boy. Just because you occasionally wear little boys’ button-downs doesn’t mean you want the haircut of a sullen preteen.

8. When people expect you to date only femme women. If you’re a masculine-presenting person sitting next to another masculine-presenting person, they will assume you are bros 100 percent of the time.

9. When straight guys assume you want to ogle women with them. Yes, she has a great ass. No, I don’t want to analyze it for seven minutes with you.

10. Trying to find men’s clothing when you have breasts and hips. We’ve made so many technological advancements and yet I can’t get a tailored shirt that leaves rooms for the curves on my body but also doesn’t look like I just put on a button-down blanket?

11. When you like something that’s considered “girly” and people are really confused. I do not see what my loving unicorns has to do with my butch presentation. I merely have layers.

12. When you want to be chivalrous but you’re not sure if that’s insulting. If I pay for her, will she think I’m trying to assert dominance? Hmm. Maybe I should pay for her and then write her a note saying that I am aware I do not own her. Yeah, that’s good.

13. That awkward moment when a gay guy hits on you. It’s like “wrong hole” but with an entire person.

14. When you see a stranger trying to figure out if you’re a man or a woman. And you want to shout, “Woman!” and keep walking so they can get on with their day already.

15. When someone asks you if you’re trying to be a man. Sometimes I wear animal prints. I am not trying to be a cheetah.

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