Hey everyone!
It’s time for our next peer review! This one had a lot of comments on our Facebook page (over 300!), so I guess it struck a bit of a chord. Here’s the question:
🌈PEER ADVICE: What are some healthy ways to get over an Ex? (See FB post here.)
One reader says this:
“Fall in love with yourself. Take yourself on dates that they wouldn’t take you on. Knock some things off your bucket list. Focus on mending the hurt parts within yourself so you can be the right person for someone. Don’t look for someone to mend them for you.”
I love, love, love this. I’m such a huge believer in being a complete person on your own without the need to have someone else fill any holes or voids within you. Of course, it’s wonderful dating someone because they compliment you, but I feel like many times, people seek relationships to fill some void. So, dating yourself and learning about yourself is a wonderful way to get over an ex!
Depending on how long the relationship was for, you may have ended up compromising bits of yourself for the sake of the relationship. Take this time to take care of yourself, spoil yourself, re-learn all of the fantastic things that make you you. Once you dive into self-care, you may find yourself getting over your ex faster than you anticipated.
Another reader says this:
“Definitely distancing yourself from everything from them. Then finding something to keep you busy and distract your mind and hanging with positive friends.”
Some people can be friends with their exes, so if that works for you, then that’s great. In most situations, though, I think the best route is to get some distance away from your ex (at least for a little bit). Try to avoid reminders of them and instead focus on you and this new journey ahead of you. Especially when it comes to social media, the best thing to do may be to unfollow them so you don’t have to subject yourself to daily reminders.
Another reader says this:
“Love urself more. Unwind. Embrace the pain until u no longer feel it. Exes will always have a place in ur heart. But it will def make u stronger. Try something new.”
I think this is my favorite piece of advice so far. The truth is, breakups hurt. There’s no way to get around feeling the pain of separating from someone who carried a lot of meaning and value in your life. It’s important that you don’t avoid the pain but rather work through it. Cry about it until it doesn’t hold power over you anymore. Talk about it with friends and family. Process the relationship until you feel like you’ve actually moved on. It’s okay to feel sad; just make sure you’re expressing those emotions in a healthy way instead of bottling them up.
Our readers had great advice this week! Let us know what you think in the comments, and make sure to keep sending us your questions on our Facebook page!
