If you’re anything like me, first dates make you nervous. Sweaty palms, stuttering voices, and aggressive stomach butterflies are just some of the fun perks most introverts feel when going on a first date.
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Not only are nerves uncomfortable, but sometimes they can make a date less fun or even less successful. I’ve certainly walked away from a first date wondering: did I blow it because I was so nervous I couldn’t even speak?
If you’re an introvert, finding coping mechanisms to help you get through dates is essential to not only having a successful date but to get up the bravery to go on them in the first place.
Below are some helpful tips every introverted lesbian should keep in their back pocket before going on a first date.
1. Come Prepared
Like giving presentations or nailing a job interview, the key to succeeding when you’re nervous is coming prepared. Obviously, don’t show up to your date with a resume, but it’s a good idea to come armed with some fun conversation starters in case there’s that dreaded awkward silence.
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If you’ve met your date from a dating app, you could probably do some light research before to figure out what she’s interested in, where she works, if she has any pets, and so forth.
Try asking her questions where she gets excited about answering. Questions like “what’s your favorite part about being a makeup artist?” or “what’s the cutest thing your dog does?” or “what’s the most interesting thing you learned in class today?” are great conversation starters. The more you ask questions about things that make your date happy, the more excited she will be and the easier that ice will melt away.
2. Be Honest
Okay, so you’re in the middle of the date, and you’re so nervous that you start to blank. Sometimes being honest is the best way to break the ice. Saying something like “sorry, I’m just so nervous – you’re really pretty,” is a great way to open up and be honest about you’re feelings.
By being honest, you take the pressure off both you and her (chances are she’s nervous too). Plus, it’s so sweet when someone says that they’re anxious to be on a date with you. There’s no shame in being nervous, and there’s no shame in being an introvert. Just be sweet and be yourself, and she’ll have a hard time not seeing how amazing you are.
3. Practice, Practice, Practice!
Like with anything, the more you practice, the better you become. Go on as many dates as possible to get used to the feeling of talking to a stranger. Hit up those dating apps and have fun with them! Not every date has to end in you finding the love of your life. The more you interact with different people, the less nervous you’ll feel. Plus, you’ll get a great idea of what kind of partner you mesh well with and what kind of partner may not be the right one for you.
Of course, the most important piece of advice is to relax and have fun. If you’re an introvert who has difficulty going on dates, send us your best dating tips in the comments to help out your fellow introverted lesbians!
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